There are some occasions in life that are rather hard to dress for. Take Tuesday night and the European premiere of Ari Seth Cohen's Advanced Style documentary. I hosted a Q&A before the screening, and I changed my mind three times in the space of an afternoon before reverting to my customary black. Twitter advised "mad shoes", so I wore the last great folly of 2013 – the pair of red suede Prada heels I bought for my father's funeral. Those shoes mean business, and wearing them felt a little as though the Aged Parent was there, holding my hand (or my feet). Still, you can see my difficulty given the abundant style promised by the evening.
The great gift of Cohen's film, funded largely by Kickstarter, and directed by Lina Plioplyte is that you gain an insight into a much more joyous way of ageing. An intimate illustration of how six uniquely stylish women live their lives, it's not all pretty hats and fripperies, nor is it a propaganda flick for the senior citizen. It is a celebration of life at its later stage. From my perspective, it was interesting to watch the audience watching the film and to hear the laughter when Ilona Royce Smithkin (93) quips that she no longer buys green bananas; or when Zelda Kaplan admits she no longer dances as much as she would like to because most of her partners are dead. There was a hoot of relief that someone mentioned death and wasn't immediately walloped with a biblical smiting. Alas, for Kaplan, 95, that came later, during New York fashion week 2012, although as Tziporah points out, she went doing something that she loved, and wouldn't we all want to do that?
I've seen the film six times now and could happily watch it six more because it truly is that much-abused term life-affirming. It's true there is a similarity with last year's homegrown Fabulous Fashionistas in that both films profile older women creating a fashionable life beyond what society maps out for them, but the New York senior way of life is beautifully observed here. Cohen told me that he found Londoners much less receptive to being style-snapped in the street - why aren't we having as much fun as our Big Apple sisters? Of the women who appear in Cohen's film and who sat alongside me on stage on Tuesday night, there was only one in black (apart from yours truly) – Joyce Carpati who uses it as a background for long strings of pearls and colourful wraps. With her thick silvery plait (last night studded with tiny gold flowers), black snood and luminous skin she was astonishingly elegant. Tziporah Salamon was wearing a lot of black, but had iced it with scarlet. From the platform shoes – "see, they're made like an ice-cream sandwich!" – to the razor-sharp bob and beautiful lacquered button hat topped with crimson peonies and long scarlet tassels, she was a walking work of art. Debra Rapoport, makes, or should that be "sculpts" her own hats and many of her clothes herself, but much is sourced from "thrifting". Lynn Dell, the self-described "countess of glamour", was dressed from head to toe in beautiful azure blue silk complemented with the biggest costume pearls I've ever seen.
What each of these women has in common is that they insist that style has nothing to do with money – "fashion says 'me too', style says 'only me'" says Dell – this is about creativity and looking good to feel good. As Iris Apfel says, "everything I've got two of, one hurts". We all need something to soothe the frazzled spirit. Jacquie "Tajah" Murdock (82), elegant in powder-blue vintage Courrèges, is almost blind with glaucoma but didn't let it to stop her being photographed for Lanvin and nor will it stop her dancing at a charity benefit later this week in New York. I think we can all take a lesson from that. Go and see the film and be educated.
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